Chapter 9 FRIENDS, LOVERS AND FAMILIES

HI ! Ready for a new chapter? No? Well you have to because it's gonna be in your final exam!

-MAYBE- ;3 Okay, this chapter is actually quite easy as you can relate it with your daily life. My dear friend Alexandra will help me to explain few subtopic regarding this chapter. THANKS ALEX!

Now, let's get it started!

FRIENDSHIP

So today, we learnt about friendships. Makes you think, really. How many friends do you have? Or rather, how many TRUE friends do you have? 

You see, most of us have this stigma whereby we believe the larger number of friends we have, the better it is. But how far does this statement pose true?

Here’s a quick look at the definition of Friendship.

~Friendship is an interpersonal relationship between two persons that is mutually productive and characterized by mutual positive regard.

Simply put, friends are the families that we choose J

There are 3 kinds of Friendships

• Friendship of reciprocity – Each individual are equal in giving and receiving
• Friendship of receptivity – One person is the primary giver and the other, primary receiver.
• For example : doctor and a patient, teacher and a student
• Friendship of association – Friendly relationship rather than a true one.

Popular Needs that Friendship Serves

UTILITY	Someone with special talents or skills that helps you to achieve your own goals.
AFFIRMATION	Someone who recognizes your attributes and personal value.
EGO SUPPORT	Someone supportive and encouraging.
STIMULATION	Someone who inspires you, introducing new ideas and experiences
SECURITY	Someone who will never hurt you

Here are the step by step development stages of friendship. 

d

1> Initial Contact and Acquaintances

2> Casual Friendship

3> Close and Intimate Relationship

Have you ever wondered what influences the way we look and perceive friendships?

Culture, Gender and Technology play a MAJOR role.

CULTURE

For example, in a collectivist culture, friendships are generally closer compared to the individualist culture.  A member of the collectivist culture would emphasize on helping others whereas a member of the individualist culture would rather emphasize on themselves.

GENDER

It is known that women tend to disclose more compared to men. Men form friendships centred around activities that they share together whereas women tend to connect more intimately by sharing feelings and emotions.

TECHNOLOGY

Quantity > Quality? Or Quality > Quantity

It is no surprise that technology has got to be one of the biggest influencer of interpersonal relationships. But how far do the pros outweigh the cons?

Is it more meaningful to have a handful of friends you can count on, or is it better to have hundreds who would never lift a finger for you in times of need?

For instance, how many of your Facebook friends do you actually know in real life? No wait, how many do you know personally?

Food for thought, eh?

_____________________________________________________________________________________

Yayy, Thanks again Alex ^^ Now, my turn to explain :D

I'll try to make it short but pack with information yaa.

LOVERS

Love is a feeling that may be characterized by passion and caring and by intimacy, passion and commitment.

There are six (6) types of love, which are ~

Sir Anwari gave an acronym to help us remember types of love.

Erika

Like

Satay

Papa

Mama

Agree

But, when I try to understand & memorize it, I made a new one which is :

Emak

Like

Satay

Papa

Makan

Ayam

It doesn't make any sense at all but it works! Thanks to Amy and Liyana of course :)

Anyway, it's not necessary for you guys to follow ours, you can make up your own words as well^^

NOW! MOVING ON~~ 

Love and Communication

Verbal and nonverbal messages echo the intimacy of a love relationship. With increased intimacy, you share more, speak in more personalized style, engage in prolonged eye contact and touch each other more often.

The kind of love you look for and the place it occupies in your life will be influenced by your CULTURE and your GENDER and by the opportunities afforded by computer-mediated communication.

FAMILIES

There are three (3) types of family, which is

1) Traditional Couples - see themselves as a blending of two people into a single couple. 

2) Independent Couples - see themselves as primary separate individuals, an individuality that is more important than the relationship between the individuals.

3) Separate Couples - see their relationship as a matter of convenience rather than of mutual love or connection.

Among the characteristics of families are

1) DEFINED ROLES - members understand the roles of each of them serves

2) RECOGNITION OF RESPONSIBILITIES - members realize that each person has certain responsibilities to the relationship

3) SHARED HISTORY AND FUTURE - members have an interactional past and an anticipated future together

4) SHARED LIVING SPACE - generally members live together

Next is Families and Communication which have three (3) patterns

1) EQUALITY - each person shares equally in the communication transactions and decision making

2) BALANCED SPLIT - each person has authority over different but relatively equal domains

3) UNBALANCED SPLIT - each one person maintains authority and decision-making power over a wider range of issues than the other

4) MONOPOLY - one person dominates and controls the relationship and the decisions made

Lastly,families and the attitudes toward them vary from one CULTURE to another and are being heavily influenced by the new computer-mediated communication.

YAYYY! WE ARE DONE! TOLD YOU THAT I'LL MAKE IT SHORT & SIMPLE. BUT.... IF YOU STILL CAN'T UNDERSTAND IT, I'M BEGGING YOU TO READ THROUGH THE WHOLE CHAPTER FROM THE TEXT BOOK! ANYWAY, GOOD LUCK UNDERSTANDING & MEMORIZING THIS CHAPTER! :)